Vow of Deliciousness

Getting back into juicing after taking several days off in rebellion has proved harder than I thought. My inner child has thrown tantrum after screaming tantrum because, "I don't want it!!!"

But with that same breath and in that same moment, I would be playing a song on my guitar singing away about how much I love God and how wonderful He is.

How could I live such a contradiction?

The answer is I can't. I lay in bed last night thinking about the war that is going on inside me. Who was I going to let win: my flesh or Him?

I decided it all hinged on this bowl of tomato soup. Endlessly bored of the cold juices, I made a soup with carrots and tomatoes and vowed it would be delicious or I would cry.

Good thing it was delicious.

So I'm sitting here filling up on this yumminess and I open my daily devotional app and start reading today's devotion. Its all about the Holy Spirit and the wonderful helper and friend that He is.

See, I love Joyce Meyer b/c she tells it like it is and doesn't beat around the bush. And I'm sitting here reading what she says about how sometimes people get saved and that's all well and good but they don't surrender everything to God and they never truly experience His fullness and calling and I realize that now I'm bawling.

And I stop and thank God for this amazing soup. And I tell Him how much I love Him and how I don't want to miss out on His plans for me.

And I continue on and read the rest of the devotion & the coinciding verses:

"We often struggle needlessly because we do not receive the help available to us. I encourage you to depend on Him, not on your own strength. Whatever you are facing, you don't have to go through it alone.

God's word for you today: Your worst day with God will be better than your best day without Him. The Holy Spirit is here to speak to you and help you in every way you need help today."

(From the book Hearing from God Each Morning by Joyce Meyer)

John 14:15-17 (MSG)

"If you love me, SHOW IT BY DOING WHAT I'VE TOLD YOU. I will talk to the Father, and he'll provide you another Friend so that you will always have someone with you. This Friend is the Spirit of Truth. The godless world can't take him in because it doesn't have eyes to see him, doesn't know what to look for. But you know him already because he has been staying with you, and will even be in you!"

(emphasis added by me to make you read it the way it smacked me in the face...)

So my Vow of Deliciousness was pointless because now the soup is delicious and I'm crying. But I'm crying b/c God is so awesome. He is so faithful and all I needed to do was trust that He IS working in me and He IS changing me bit by bit and He IS my strength in this.

So there you have it. I am full of the now devoured soup and I am filled to the top with His Loving Mercy to continue on for another day.

Surrendering is hard... but obvi-totes worth it. ;)

[obvi-totes: obviously + totally - originally coined by Schwan himself]

love. love. love.